Saturday, August 22, 2009

How to Get Ex Boyfriend Back: Psychology Makes All the Difference

By Paul Lindquist

Have you recently been involved in a breakup? Do you have a strong desire to get ex boyfriend back? Do you have a dark hole in your heart since the breakup? Are you in continual pain from the loneliness of the separation. Here are some useful ways to get ex boyfriend back.

The beginning step to winning your ex boyfriend back is to give him some space. You need to put an end to daily contact of any kind, especially seeing him in person. Most men don't like this kind of behavior, and by engaging in it you not get any nearer to winning him back.

Instead, knowing how to get ex boyfriend back begins by altering the psychology surrounding the relationship. In other words, rather than you begging him to take you back, you want him to be the one begging you. Once you accomplish that, it will be very easy to get ex boyfriend back.

In order to make your ex boyfriend pursue you, you need to become more desirable to him. This starts with a change in attitude. The first step to this attitude change is to deal with the negative emotions surrounding the relationship and the breakup.

One good way to deal with these emotions is by writing a letter to your ex boyfriend describing all the pain you felt during the relationship and the things you wished you'd told him. Then, don't send the letter. Instead, get rid of the letter. Burn it, throw it away, do something with it, but get it out of your life. This will help you close out that part of the relationship.

Once the letter is destroyed, address the other negative emotions and attitudes you have. A good method of accomplishing this is asking empowering questions every day. An example would be-rather than asking "why do these things always happen to me?" Ask something like "what do I like about this situation that I hadn't realized before?"

Regarding your ex, ask things like "what are some of the things I really like about him?" Focus on what's good in your own life and the good qualities with your ex boyfriend. Also, after you resume contact with your ex boyfriend, keep the discussion centered around positive issues, and avoid the negative issues that always led to fights.

In order to get ex boyfriend back, you need to make him feel good about you and the relationship again. You can help him to do this by becoming better at the things you know that he likes about you. For example, if he likes how you cook, learn some new recipes and surprise him with some new dishes.

Along these same lines, you can get ex boyfriend back by taking a look at things about yourself that you could improve. You probably know two or three areas of your life that he regularly complained about. Take a good look at how you can eliminate these weaknesses.

Finally, go out with other people on a casual basis. Nothing serious here. This is merely just to help your ex see that you can attract others, thereby making yourself more attractive to him. This psychological trick will make him want you back again, putting you in a great position to get ex boyfriend back.

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